What's he put himself on display for? may be asked.
I don't really know why but I've got the urge to reveal myself, and rather than stand outside and get arrested I thought I'd do it here.
I was born in Gainsborough, Lincolnshire at a very early age, (The old ones are the best), son of a machinist fitter father and a quick witted mother. My father was a former Sapper who was persuaded to leave by dear old mum and I think it left a hole in his life. He became a keen terrier from then on. By that I mean a member of the Territorial Army Reserve for those who think my pedrigree is just that, and not lineage. So every weekend he would go off to war and mum had a few days peace with him away playing soldiers.
I was educated, of sorts and left my secondary modern school at the age of 15, with a fist full of academic awards, those being a cycling proficiency certificate,(with badge I might add), a 50 yards swimming certificate and a letter from the nit nurse. Of course I was like every 15 year old, knew it all and was alert for any job about to hunt me down.
It was over the evening meal one day that I mentioned to Pater that his weekend events left him left him looking particulary happy and that I wondered if I may like the army. I'm not saying he was enthusiastic about the possibility of his eldest lad serving Queen and Country. But three weeks later on 7th September 1972,I was getting off the train in Chepstow ,as a budding apprentice fitter machinist class 3. My preference at the time was to have joined the Grenadier Guards, but after all I was 15 and Dad and the recruiting Sergeant at Scunthorpe, (who funnily enough was the PSI of dads terrier unit), thought 'The Sappers' was the place for me. I could kiss that recruiting sergeant now, imagine 25 years in the guards!
My time at Chepstow was well spent and after studying hard and putting 50% effort in all that I did, I passed out having gained the rank of Apprentice Tradesman. I know I started as an apprentice tradesman, but now I did have a Class II Fitter Engine trade qualification under my belt and credits to my City & Guilds certificates.(Not everyone is a born leader, I developed a little late thats all!). These now had pride of place on my wall, along with the former cycling and swimming achievements. Oh! you noticed, I said earlier I started as a fitter machinist but now was a Fitter Engine. Well thats the RE's for you.
I'm sorry to say I didn't enjoy Chepstow much, (Even though I linked Sites), I didn't like the workshop environment . The marching around, playing with guns and camping out was excellent, so I found myself looking forward to Saturday mornings, which was military training, and trying to hurry Monday to Friday away. But Chepstow did put one highlight in my life, I met my wife Kim there, however I didn't know she was to become my wife till two years later. Now the mother of my two offsprings Claire & Rod. (I was not much of a runner either!)
In the summer of 1974 I arrived at 3 Training Regiment Royal Engineers (TRRE) situated and known as 'COVE' in Hampshire, a name that springs easily off any sappers lips. I had the joy of saying "HELLO MATE, CAN YOU SHOW ME WHERE 57's BLOCK IS?" to a male endowed with Lance Corporal tapes on his arm. I spent the next two hours running round it, least I should forget. This pleasure was shared with others who had arrived prior to and after me. When the nice NCO's ,who were to train us to become proper soldiers and take those nasty habits we'd picked up at Chepstow away, stopped shouting, which was after 16 weeks, training started in earnest and lasted 16 weeks. Surprising that.
I left 'Cove'as a Combat Engineer class II. I enjoyed it immensely, which just shows how depraved and sad a man can get. I was now a man, 17 years old and now in 'Mans Service'
as we liked to call it.
In January 1975 I arrived at 50 Field Squadron RE in Maidstone, on turning up at the guardroom I spotted another endowed male, this time with 2 tapes sporting each arm, so putting my best into it marched up, halted, and with a stamping of feet reported humbly my lowly presence to god. He looked up from his paper held his hand out and said " I'm Mick Chritchlow, your gonna be working on my shift, pass me your bag I'll take you to the block".
I spent the 300 metres onroute waiting for him to suddenly erupt and shout and scream at my audacity of letting him carry one of my bags, even though I was laden down myself.
Welcome to the real Army. 50 Sqn was great, a Sqn soon to be designated (Construction) and practising what it was destined to become. My 2 years consisted of 6 months in Canada, 6 months in Belize and numerous Ex's around the UK bulding things. I didn't get to see much of Kim though, (remember the girl from Chepstow), so when my posting arrived detailing me to Germany we decided to get married before going. I left Maidsone with only a trusted couple knowing about the event, I think we could only afford to have a best man and another attend and not as many as I would have liked . Well times are hard for a then 20 yr old sapper.
On April 9th 1977 Kim and I married in Lydney in Glos, however on April 8th 1977 about 20 hairy arsed squaddies arrived in minibuses demanding accommodation and a stag night. Trust them not to let the moment pass. My in laws managed to sort it in their stride and not blow a fuse.
In June 1977 after honeymooning in a caravan on Mablethorpes, (Honest I'm not making it up) Kim and I arrived in Germany. I was now a member of 37 Fd Sqn RE, it was here I found my true love, Combat Engineering, apart from being in a bridge competition at Maidstone I hadn't practised the skills learned in training so far.(Told you I was sad)
37 Fd Sqn RE was full of misfits and at first I thought I had joined part of a Penal Regiment. The Sqn at the time filled 35 Regt's jail and 28 Amphibious Regiment's jail with inmates from the Sqn, (Lucky the Engineers had 2 barracks in Hameln at the time). However 2 tours of Northern Ireland, 1 in an infanteer role in S.Armagh and the other as engineers, smoothed the edges and it became, and still is one of the best Sqns in the Corps. During my time there I also went to Chatham for 6 months to become a Class 1 Fitter RE, qualified as a Class 1 Combat Engineer and passed a JNCO cadre. The cadre is a story on it's own, if any of you are out there who was on it with me, shall I tell?....
I reluctantly left 37 Sqn to go back to Cove........
However this time in May 1981 I was now one of those well endowed, (Kim may disagree) JNCOs having now passed the above mentioned cadre. I spent the next 10 weeks on the JNCO's Instructors course, which involved a labotomy, the insertion of a 100 kw speaker system and clockwork so I could march round shouting obscenities at the future Corps members. Unfortunately after passing the course they stopped recruiting. I was promoted to full Corporal and taught military skills to budding MT Section Commanders Courses. Still I got my Field Section Commanders course under my belt, learnt many training skills and did my career no harm at all.
In early 1984 I arrived back in Hameln a full screw (Cpl), also back in my beloved 37 Sqn, trying to win the section competitions and teaching on Regimental JNCO Cadres. I was really full of myself. Until in early 1985 the Sqn 2ic called me in. He had this great idea, wouldn't it be a good career move if I attend the JNCO Instructors course at Cove, after much shouting and screaming it finally sunk in that I had this Qualification, and should he post me to do it again (That 10 weeks is sheer hell), he would find the nose of a multi span MGB where the sun don't shine.
In early 1986 he summoned me again with the same cunning plan, again after much ado he said, "So you don't want a Sergeants post at Trg Regts then." After planting a kiss on his cheek ( I'll not divulge which) the mercenary corporal left the 2ic's office.....
So in May 1986 Sgt Amey RE was back at 1TRRE this time shelling recruits like peas and having a great time, the two years literally whizzed by and 100s of recruits later was promoted to SSgt and sent to 1st Fd Sqn RE. If anyone get's the chance to do Trg Regt do it. It's a laugh and you'll get to know literaly 100's of Sapper friends.
This website is dedicated to that period in 1st Fd Sqn so I won't add much here, only to say a Tp SSgts post must give the biggest sense of achievement. You have a troop to nurture and it culminates all lessons learnt previously into that role. I loved it, it was the most enjoyable part of my service. I'd be Tp SSgt for ever if I could turn back time.
After 1st Fd, in Apr 1992 I was promoted WO2(QMSI) and posted to 277 Fd Sqn(ADR)V at RAF Leuchars in Scotland. I wanted to go to a Regiment but no-one would swap. Thank god they didn't, Its fun in the Terriers, I learnt that from dads experiences. I know now why he beamed after a weekends training. Both Kim and I were accepted into the community and made many friends there. Mind you I'm not keen on RAF Leuchars personnel. I found them to be miserable gits, very anti army and difficult to mix with but thats another story. Funny that! They were fine everwhere else I went, it must be something in their 'stovies'. All the Jocks thought I was there as Cultural Attache, it must be because of the number of bridges I left scattered around Fife.
From there in 1994 I was posted as SSM to 2HQ Sqn at Hohne part of 32 Armd Engr. The then OC was Major Jim Donohoe a man I'd briefly met when I was in 37. He had become RSM 35 Engr Regt prior to my posting to TRRE as a Sgt.
Brilliant man, became a good friend, you can see why he made Colonel.(Bugger never writes though). During his time the Sqn was a happy well knit motavated unit. The job was nearly as good as being a Troop SSgt, but you have no real control over troops, without taking them off the troop SSgts. I've been there and didn't like it myself so didn't do it. I still hear off these lads and can say SSM is just 2nd best to SSgt. I'm hoping someone will do a 2 Sqn site, now that would be a good idea Taff Evans if your reading....
When Jim left the new OC led us to Bosnia as part of IFOR, I must admit this was one of the least enjoyable times in my career, job satisfaction wise. Running a grotty Old Sawmill Camp, trying to improve the lads lot whilst the lads were out improving everyone elses but their own living conditions. I was dissapointed how they had been treated. The age of "look after those below" by senior officers had gone, but that's the modern army for you. However I still had a great bunch of soldiers and workers to keep me in cheer when I looked round.
From there Kim and I went out to grass on retirement. My last day in the Army was my first day in my present job as a police officer. Thats why I didn't say Kim and I went out on grass to retirement. I have completed my probation and can't reveal my present job or I'd have to chop your head off and put it in a safe. I can say my plain clothed allowance is welcome. So all you 40+ heading for civvy street, you can teach an old dog new tricks.
I'm now settled and leading a normal life, so why do I keep old links with the past.
I already revealed that and it's true, I'm a sad old fart who misses the past.
WASN'T IT FUN
